


Love Is Like A Bomb

by abbyli



Category: Marvel Cinematic Universe
Genre: Darcy Lewis is Tony Stark's Sister, F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-01-08
Updated: 2017-01-08
Packaged: 2018-09-15 17:14:20
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,966
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9247505
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/abbyli/pseuds/abbyli
Summary: Darcy’s turning thirty. Thor’s brought some of his magical mead from space. There’s karaoke. This is not good.





	

**Author's Note:**

  * For [Hollyspacey](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Hollyspacey/gifts).



> Dedicated to the amazing Hollyspacey. Happy belated birthday, lovey!

polyvore: [ [darcy ](http://www.polyvore.com/darcy_love_is_like_bomb/set?id=214538646)]

.

When Darcy realized she was turning thirty, all she wanted was a nice dinner with Jane, Thor, and Steve. Something easy and simple. She wouldn’t say no to diamonds though but that’s another story.

Then Tony found out. Ever since learning that the rich Stark was her half brother, they were still tiptoeing around their relationship with each other. At her brother’s insistence and _well...nagging,_ she had changed her plans and agreed to a party at the penthouse in Avengers tower.

So that was how she got here, covered in glitter in a crowded room at Avengers tower with a bottle of Thor’s magic ale in her hand and loud annoying rock music blasting away. Jane’s trying to talk to her and Darcy has to yell _WHAT_ at least ten times back. This is such a disaster.

The ale had been passed around through the Avengers. Thor had warned everyone that it had differing effects on people. Some it would not affect in the slightest and some...

_“Woohooo birthday girl!”_

Some would be drunk out of their gourds.

Darcy winced as Steve staggered past, throwing an arm around her shoulders and nearly sending her crashing to the floor. “How much of that have you had?” she shouts to be heard over the music.

Steve gives her a bleary eyed smile before belching loudly. “I dunno, darlin’.” Oh god, so apparently Captain America gets a southern accent when he’s drunk. She’s gonna kill Thor for bringing that stuff.

Darcy rolls her eyes. “How about we get you to bed?”

“All right!” Steve suddenly cheers. “I’m gonna have sex tonight!”

Of course, the DJ had been changing songs at that moment and Steve’s words ring loud and clear through the penthouse. Darcy has the strange urge to kick her boyfriend right in the junk.

“Attention, losers!” Darcy looks up to the tiny stage that had been constructed and sees her brother making a mad grab for the microphone from the DJ. “It’s time for karaoke! Who would like to go first?”

“Me!”

Darcy grabs for Steve’s arm before he runs up to the stage like a five year old before slapping her hand to her forehead. This is not going to be good.

Jane joins her again, her phone in her hand. “Think of it as blackmail for a later date,” she says, pressing record on the video player and holding it up.

“This song -- _hic!_ \-- is dedicated to the birthday girl and my lover -- _burp!_ \-- Larcy Dewis!” Steve slurs into the mike after pushing Tony right from the stage. “Hit it!”

Darcy spies Bucky sitting in a chair near the stage, a bottle of that ale in both hands and his hair hanging limply in his eyes. At the first highly out of tune note from his inebriated friend, Bucky lets out a laugh that sounds like it belongs to a pterodactyl, dropping the bottles to the carpeted floor and clutching his stomach.

“ _Love is like a bomb._..”

Oh fuck god no. No!

“ _Bomb, b-bomb, b-bomb_!” He did all the right things, the grunting like someone had punched him in the stomach, the gyrating and the thrusting.

Pepper was squealing and already unbuttoning her shirt, Tony trying to stop her with a, ‘I have made a great mistake’ look on his face. She smirks. Good, he deserves it after planning this ridiculous event.

 _“I’m hot, sticky sweet. From my head to my feet_.”

When Steve’s sober, she’s going to kill him, bring him back to life and kill him again.

_“Pour some sugar on me! In the name of love! Pour some sugar on me! Come on, fire me up!”_

Well, to put it bluntly, what happens after is not ‘fired up’.

Steve trips over the microphone cord and topples right from the stage and to the floor. Her annoyance disappears, replaced by worry as she darts forward with Thor beside her. He lays sprawled face down on his belly, hands stretched out before one pops up. “I’m oookay!”

Tony detangles the cord from Steve’s legs. “Okay folks, this got out of hand. Party’s over.” He shoots her an apologetic look. “Sorry.” He mouths. Darcy nods before helping Thor ease Steve to his feet.

They move easily through the throng of people to the elevators. Steve’s dead weight between them, Thor supporting most of him as the silver doors close behind them.

“I’m very sorry, Darcy,” her friend suddenly says. “I shouldn’t have brought the ale. I thought that your friends might enjoy something different from their Midgardian ale.”

Darcy sighs, opening her mouth to reply and Steve suddenly belches in her face. She uses her free hand to push his mug away from her. “It’s okay, you had no way of knowing.”

“I feel like your birthday was ruined,” Thor says, hanging his head.

“It kind of was,” Darcy agrees, wincing at the flash of hurt in Thor’s eyes. “I wanted to go out to dinner with Jane, you, and this doofus here but then Tony found out and organized this whole she-bang. He means well and you meant well so I’m not mad. Just tired.”

The elevator dings, having arrived at her and Steve’s shared apartment. Darcy grunts with effort when Steve suddenly shifts all of his weight to her side, Thor wrapping an arm around his waist to ease him off as they move to the bedroom. She lets go first when Thor flops Steve onto the bed, turning his head to the side so he doesn’t smother himself in the middle of the night.

“Thanks Thor, _oomph!”_ She’s suddenly swept up in a pair of brutally strong arms, pressing her against his chest in a hug. She taps his upper bicep. “Can’t breathe, dude.”

“Oh, I’m sorry!” Thor releases his hold, her face popping up to his shoulder. He presses a kiss to her forehead before whispering, “I’ll make this up to you.”

“A trip to your home planet wouldn’t hurt,” she smiles. “And diamonds. Lots of diamonds.”

Thor smiles back. “I’ll see what I can do.”

“Cool!” Darcy laughs. “You’re forgiven.”

He leaves then, casting her one last look before disappearing from the apartment. Alone with the passed out Captain on her bed, Darcy reaches for the garbage pail and places it by the bed before pulling the covers up over his legs. “It’s gonna be a long night, buster.”

She settles down in the armchair by the bed, a spare blanket from the closet pulled over her as she readies for the long night.

-;

To her surprise, Steve only pukes once. Darcy dozes unevenly in the chair after getting him through that, her phone going off when Jane sends her the video from the party. Watching it with the volume muted, she cannot help but laugh. She loves the moron in the video. God, she loves him.

She’s awoken at seven to more retching, this time from the bathroom. Darcy pushes the blanket off of her legs and pads to the bathroom to see Bucky hunched over the toilet, clutching the sides like it’s going to fly away from him.

“You do realize you are in the wrong apartment, right?”

“It was either here or throwing up in the elevator,” He gags, pushing his hair out of his eyes.

“Aren’t you supposed to have breakfast with Sharon in an hour?” Darcy reminds him, laughing evilly to herself when he throws up again at the mere mention of food. After handing him a wet washcloth, she kicks Bucky from her apartment and returns to her now awakening boyfriend.

“Well you look like something the cat threw up and ate again.”

Steve glares at her. “Thanks.” He rubs at his forehead, groaning. “What exactly happened last night?”

Darcy flops down in the chair, crossing her arms and legs in front of her. “Well, it was supposed to be my birthday party and Thor brought some of his magic mead.”

Steve groans again. “I drank it, didn’t I?”

“Enough to declare Asgard a dry planet,” Darcy says.

“I wasn’t that bad!”

“Well,” Darcy grabs her phone. “This video begs to differ.” It’s quite humorous watching how big Steve’s eyes get as he watches the video of himself dancing and gyrating. “I think you put Def Leppard out of business.”

Asgast, he grabs the pillow from the bed and hides the phone under it. The music from the video still plays, soft and tinny. “I cannot believe...”

“Well believe it, baby. Watch the rest of the video. I think you will get an idea of how the evening ended.”

He winces. “Was it bad?”

“Well, doing a face plant off of the stage must have hurt.”

“Darcy, no!”

“Darcy, yes.” Darcy smirks. “Okay, okay, I’ll stop torturing you. You should go get a hot shower and I will make some coffee.”

“Thank you,” Steve attempts to get to his feet and nearly falls backward on the bed again, letting out a groan as he clutches his forehead. “Never again,” he mutters. “Never, never, never again.”

Darcy rolls her eyes, padding to the kitchen and beginning the coffee. She hears the water turn on a few moments later. After preparing a pot, her phone buzzes.

_**BROTHER:** I wanted to say I’m sorry._

Darcy types back, fighting a grin.

_I’ll accept it with a new birthday cake, one that isn’t laced with booze._

Her phone is silent for what seems like forever. Then --

_Deal._

She laughs. She and Tony are still learning but they’ll get there.

“What’s so funny?” Darcy turns. Steve’s standing in the doorway of the kitchen, dressed in jeans and a sweater with his hair still wet from the shower.

“Oh, my brother. He’s getting a new birthday cake for me.”

Steve blanches. “Please tell me I didn’t do anything to the cake last night.”

“And what if I did? What would you do?”

“I didn’t?”

Darcy shakes her head before handing him a mug of black coffee. “You’re in the clear, buster.”

 _Buster._ She’s starting to like that nickname.

“Darcy?”

“Hmm?” When she looks back at Steve, he’s holding a small rectangular jewelry box in his hand. “Holy moly.”

“Don’t worry, it’s not a ring,” he tells her. “It’s something you’ve been eyeing in that magazine for a while.”

When she pops the box open, she finds a circular gold locket nestled on crushed velvet, a tiny ruby set in it‘s cover. Her nail slides around the side and it pops open, revealing two pictures of her two beloved dogs that she had lost that previous year back to back from cancer.

Sudden tear spring to her eyes. “Steve...”

“Your mom gave me the pictures the last time we visited when I told her what I was getting you for your birthday. I just thought --” His voice is cut off by Darcy pressing her lips to his and thank god, he’s brushed his teeth. When they break away, he’s smiling. “It’s okay?”

Darcy nods. “Yeah, it’s okay. Will you put it on me?”

“Sure.”

She turns and lifts her hair up and watches as the locket dangles in front of her for a moment before resting against her throat as the chain locks shut. “Thank you. I love it.”

Steve presses a kiss to her temple. “I’m so sorry I ruined your birthday.”

“It’s okay. You just made up for a big chunk of it right here,” Darcy says, tapping the necklace with her index finger. “And you can make up the rest of it with breakfast at my favorite café.”

He kisses her again. “And dinner and breakfast in bed tomorrow and so many more after that,” he says. His forehead rests against hers for a moment. “I love you, Darcy Lewis.”

“I love you too Steven Grant Rogers.”

**Author's Note:**

> Yeah Steve’s a doofus. He will definitely make up for screwing up her birthday party in more ways than one. Leave your thoughts in the box below! Thank you loves!


End file.
